I help high-achieving women who feel stuck and / or unfulfilled in their careers or their lives gain clarity on their callings and goals, and pursue them with far less stress and far greater joy and energy.
High-performing individuals are an organization’s greatest asset. They are hard-working, conscientious and driven to exceed expectations. But often they can sabotage their own success. This is even more so for women because our fears of criticism keep us from speaking up, stepping out and showing up as fully as we’re capable of.
In my work with high-achieving women, I often see them short-change their potential by doubting themselves, justifying their choices or otherwise playing small and avoiding opportunities.
Or I see them push themselves to extreme lengths to prove their worth, at the expense of their health, relationships and joy of life.
Brilliant women are feeling unhappy or unfulfilled in their successes and angry or ashamed in their failures. And this needs to stop!
I’ve done extensive research on women’s confidence in the workplace. And what I’ve uncovered is that many high-achieving women fail to rise to their full potential because they have Fragile Confidence.
What is Fragile Confidence?
Fragile confidence lives in that precarious space between doing well and feeling “not enough”.
And I’ve seen way too many high-achieving women live in that space. Their drive to do well keeps them pushing harder and harder. When they succeed in their efforts, they’re burdened by the pressure to maintain. They stop taking risks and begin to play small.
And when they can’t meet their own (often unreasonable expectations), they raise the bar even higher for themselves. They strive even harder and sooner or later they burnout. Or give up.
Either way, they never address the feelings of “not enough” that underpin their behaviors. Which is why researchers have called fragile confidence a “cradle to grave” construct. And it keeps them from realizing their full potential.
Fragile Confidence often shows up as:
- Micromanagement and the need to be in control
- Distrust of others
- Difficulty saying “no” or setting boundaries
- Inability to relax or have fun
- Lack of empathy for fellow team members
- Short-lived happiness when successful
- Shame (or blame) in the face of failure or criticism
- Feeling like a fraud
At an extreme, high-performers can come across as overly ambitious, opportunistic or as having narcissistic tendencies.
Coaching for Confidence
Through my research, I’ve developed a pioneering framework of Authentic Confidence that forms the basis of my Leadership Coaching. It allows you to unpeel the layers that drive you insecurely to succeed, and to connect to the intrinsic motivation that leads to purposeful goals and secure striving (even if it is for the same goals). You experience far greater joy, flow, clarity, and achieve both success and fulfillment.
Coaching with Compassion
What’s unique in my approach is that I help you establish a safe space that gives you the permission to take risks (despite the possibility of failure) and to engage in difficult conversations (despite the possibility of criticism or rejection). Because I know how hard you can be on yourself. And I know that my compassion will build the neural connections that help you relate to yourself with compassion all your life.
If you’ve been trying harder and harder, and are feeling stuck, unhappy, unfulfilled – or simply drained and burnt out, book yourself in for a free half hour call to see if Leadership Coaching is right for you.
You’re under no obligation to hire me with this call. It’s purpose is for me to understand your goals and your readiness for change, and for you to understand how I work and what the coaching entails. Because both you and I want to feel good about working together 🙂
How Leadership Coaching Works
Leadership Coaching is a 4-session package where I take my high performing clients through a coaching journey that is based on my research backed framework for building Authentic Confidence. Because Authentic Confidence underlies success AND fulfillment, not one at the expense of the other.
It has helped my clients become more focused, more engaged and more energized, by connecting to the power that lives within them, and to the purpose that pulls them forward. It has helped them understand the often subconscious beliefs that are driving their behaviors, gain clarity on their strengths and purpose-driven goals, and create a comprehensive plan of action to achieve them.
You can expect to experience far greater joy, far less stress and far better relationships with yourself, in your relationships and with the work you do.
- It starts with a session to understand your triggers and stress responses, while also gaining clarity on your strengths and “superpowers”. This is the beginning of the journey to inner connection and a sense of “enoughness”.
- We then uncover who you are as a person and as a leader, the personal contribution you want to make through your work, and who you want to be in your relationships both at work and in life. This is a powerful experience that lays the ground work for success and fulfillment.
- We then create goals that are in alignment with your vision and your strengths, establish tools to overcome challenges and stay motivated, and connect with your personal “tribe” of support and accountability.
- And through it all, we place your physical, emotional and spiritual self-care as primary to achieving your goals. We identify patterns of thought and behavior that derail you, and create fool-proof habits that help you manage stress and show up energized every day.
The coaching package provides you with access to a customized online platform where I upload forms and worksheets as we work together, and where you can stay in touch with me via email between sessions. This is to help you access support in one place and to reflect on your learning as we work towards change.
Homaira has a thorough understanding of the psychological construct of self-worth, and how it plays out in women’s lives, in their relationships and in the workplace. With her deep knowledge of the science of positive psychology and her long-standing expertise in coaching, I highly recommend her to help women build optimal self-worth towards their most successful and meaningful lives.
-Dr. Itai Ivtzan, Associate Professor Naropa University
Working with Homaira Kabir was a provocative and thoughtful experience. Her voice is soothing and gentle, yet she does not shy away from tackling some challenging issues that may be getting in the way of our confidence and success. The biggest change I’ve noticed is how rooted my self-confidence is in early childhood experiences and how those formative experiences still shape my life today, and how important it is to be mindful and stay present. Her course is filled with citations that help make the case of why the course is tackling a particular subject or why the exercises help us open up to be more confident.
-Kathleen P., Los Angeles, CA
I highly recommend Homaira as a coach for women. Her insights on a woman’s self-worth, confidence, and fulfillment are based on the latest research. I know women in the business world need her talents more than ever as we’re seeing women losing their ambition when facing gender obstacles at work.
-Nancy Clark, Director Forbes WomenMedia
Homaira’s presentation resonated with all our female leaders. Her compelling approach combines the latest cutting-edge research with simple, evidence-based practices to make measurable change. Her talk will engage an audience intellectually and emotionally and ensure no participant leaves without at least one valuable take-away!
- JESSICA AMORTEGUI, Senior Director, Learning and Development, Logitech
Homaira Kabir is a trusted voice in helping overcome the self-doubt and fear that hold so many people back from achieving the life they most desire. She not only offers scientifically sound principles and cutting-edge research, she also shares practical, actionable steps you can implement right away to begin improving your life today.
-Sandra Joseph, Broadway Speaker and Performer
If your life or career or business is not going in the direction you want it go, book yourself in for a free half hour call to see if Leadership Coaching is right for you.